Circles crop up everywhere, even in unexpected places
I am reminded of a story many years ago when I was on the first day of my Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP) Trainers’ Training.
As I sat in the class ready to begin, my attention was drawn to an image on the flipchart. (Back in those days, the only educational aid was the flipchart!) Written in marker pen, there was a large black circle with the word ‘me’ written inside in red. Straightforward enough, yet there was more: overlaid on the circle was a large X, crossing out the word ‘me’.
It triggered a strong reaction from one man in the room right at the start. He sounded frustrated, exclaiming to the trainers, “What do you mean crossing out ‘me’? I’ve spent years changing myself and now you’re asking me to be ‘not me’?” He was so outraged!
I don’t remember the answer he got or whether his question ever got answered yet this interaction has stayed with me over the years. A circle is a universal shape we take for granted in our lives, yet when you pause and look around you will notice how circles are intrinsic to design both in nature and everyday objects. The word ‘me’ is another universal that we take for granted. Likewise, a cross is two lines that intersect at an angle.
How can something simple be complex? This essence of opposites lies at the heart of Monthly Mandala. It represents dynamic tension with a creative twist. Drawing a circle and filling it in with colour and line can be described as simply child-like, yet layers of complexity underpin this. We can take this at the surface level of being an activity that is fun and relaxing as well as becoming curious at the processes underneath.
A line from the Book of Changes, I Ching, describes how “the wind blows over the lake and stirs the surface of the water. Thus visible effects of the invisible manifest themselves.” This is similar to how a pebble dropped into water creates a circle that ripples outwards, or how rainfall creates a multiple moving dance of circular ripples on puddles of water.
The neurologist Robert Scaer describes this motion as rhythmic circling. He applies this not only to all of nature but to all of the body systems too. What does he mean by rhythmic circling? He’s talking about cycles of change that have repeating patterns including day-night, sleep-wake, the moon, menstruation. We are part of nature yet so often we live lives as though we are separated from nature.
One of the principles underlying Monthly Mandala is the idea of whole parts and parts belonging to a whole. While we may feel disconnected, we are both parts and whole. Simply put, a finger is whole yet it is part of a hand. We can apply this to everything. Even though we may experience disconnection and separation, at another level we are still whole. Thinking mandalas, you can draw a circle but not feel connected to it. At other times you have more of a relationship with what you have drawn.
This goes back to the idea of ‘me – not me’. Sometimes what I draw feels like me and at other times I can’t see me in the drawing. I may want to engage with it or I may want to throw it away. If we can stay with the puzzle and allow curiosity to be in the air, we open up a space of possibility. It is like throwing a ball up into the air and noticing the inbetween space before we catch it again.
NLP is underpinned by an attitude of curiosity. I wonder whether this is what the NLP trainers were conveying in their use of a circle and cross. Understated, simple yet complex.